Wonder

Glistening ocean self content
Lazy air of no intent
The moon gleamed maliciously
Romance wafts deliciously
The ocean seemed to groan and stretch
With every shadow the moon did etch
Leaving myriads of expressions
To an ever lasting impression
As the moon and sea made love
With no sense of when and now
Did I watch like a spy
Sight beyond beauty it made me cry.

The Banyan Tree

Rested at her feet
Countless days
Sheltered from the heat
Watching her sleeves sway
Her extended arms
Always room for comfort
Skin weathered and warm
Her feet rain soaked with dirt
When the sun shone hard
She stretched out wide
Brow caused creased doubts
Herself scaled and dried
She saw many people come and go by
They played about and sat around
Sometimes for a good cry
Sharing secrets unspoken unfound
When the rain came
She soaked in its affection
Her limbs danced untamed
In frenzy and imperfection
She saw so many lovers
And bore so many children
In her fruits and flowers
She never was deemed barren
Eons passed as with age
Through a glorious past
After much decay and damage
She stood still graceful sighing her last.

The School KFI had a beautiful Banyan Tree. Have wonderful memories of climbing trees, scrapping knees, mango moments, waiting for car, snake spotting, crying beneath the trees, and lovely nature walks......also escaping PT which I detested.

Manufacturing Defects:

All she was a kid of ten
Consciousness struck don’t know when
Pleasant kid not much trouble
But just then they burst her bubble
Till such time she was considered cute
That ensured peace and mind astute
Soon they pointed here and there
Then it became too much to bear
Barbie dreams ramp walk rage
Too much too soon at this age
What was just pure puppy fat?
Had to be turned to vital stats
So she starved herself to sleep
As weight loss came did insecurity creep
The going only just got tough
The extra pound lost never enough
Sweet valley twins and Judy Blume
To strange notions gave much room
Coming of age puberty spell
New set of issues came to dwell
Instead of math she had to max
Focus shifted to bikini wax
As the hemlines just got higher
Crushes came and kindled fire
Gone were the cheeks and paunch
A million desires did it launch
By the time she turned twenty
Obsessions were born by plenty
Mirror mania weighing scale woes
It was never right tip or toe
Stumbled marriage suitor hunt
Increasing bills bank balance brunt
In due course match was made
She thought the dividends were finally paid
Diet food drove him mad
So did her frenzy for Femina Fads
Then one day he let it drop
All this crap had to stop
Just when it was a little too late
Realization curbed trouble spate
Shook her shoulders screamed it clear
To insanity she was driving him near
Finally did she let go
And who she really was got to know
Once gone fancies fickle
Life came one full circle.


Reminiscences of a crazy obsession brought down to sensible levels!!! Weight loss woes when will it ever go!!!

(I)(D(ent)ity)) Crisis

Born I was one sultry summer
Saw the sun glower and heat simmer
Indian Cricket saw world cup victory
My folks saw unfold my story
Since that day in sultry June
I started doing things too soon
Spoke my words much too early
Stated preferences loud and clearly
Didn’t know much from bad to good
But knew all I wanted about my food
Went to school at tiny three
Crying all the way not letting mum free
Hated the place from the start
Cause at mummy’s lap was my heart
From then onwards till about ten
Homeward bound I wondered when
Not that I didn’t like school much
But weird child I was such
Soon distaste I overcame
For in many things I made a name
Drama, dance and sweet misbehavior
Did I find my boredom savior
Through mango moods and mulberry ambushes
Also went boys and childhood crushes
Of course I read my lessons too
Respite from which were but few
At school I declared much to their terror
An ambition that was a comedy of error
Arc light dreams I saw so vivid
But made my folks much too livid
I went to high school heavy hearted
From those dreams dear departed
Accounts, commerce and economics
Read anything they were from comic
Fell in love first time folly
But then it seemed so loft and lovely
Came college and more confusion
So much it was it went to seclusion
Fleeting friendships and conventional crap
Went thru the rut thru tunnel and trap
Read my major halfheartedly
Five years hence was done finally
Grabbed by corporate clutches I evolved
Some identity issues came resolved
Financial freedom finally saw
Those insecurities that earlier did gnaw
Shying all praise and pity
I finally saw an identity……


Random thoughts on childhood....how ambitions take birth and evolve and die and take new forms. To make things simple I ve always wanted to be an actress.....I still do....

Small Miracles

Unspoken hurt
The past dirt
Accusing eyes
Those silly white lies
What could have been?
What cant be seen
Wasted moments
Tension torments
Splitting headache
Verge of heartbreak
Bathroom tears
Reeks in fear
Sleepless nights
Telephone fights
Bottled emotions
Shallow notions
There s no more to know
You’re ready to let go
Memories stay
For miracles you pray
Final glance
Just one more chance?
What is meant to be?
Is not me, you but we
The decided fate
Love conquers hate!


Situations when one wants to give it all up and exhale, and once exhaled....wants the madness back.

Losing Touch

I reach out
between nagging doubt
will you will you not
surrender to forbidden thought
unsure what next is
afraid something is amiss
this we enjoyed so much before
always ended up asking for more
as night blended with day
and invariable tiredness giving way
our spent selves fell
into sweet slumber's spell
Now as I reach out to you
your overtures are but few
I know there is I cant do much
Now that we are losing touch


The worst rejection. When a relationship is breaking, and only one person wants to work it out. You know the physical connection is dying because you re not bonding emotionally. You try, the other person cant say no, cant give in. You know that its bound to happen......

Corridors

I've walked many corridors through my life
through happiness, victory, struggle and strife
I walked with a glance towards the open
Thinking about people and words spoken
I saw my life unfold ahead
Imagined what could have been with the dead
I wondered at what lay in the future
Sometimes fought fears so immature
School,college,work
Through many corridors did I lurk
walking the sunny side most time
through though,song and mime
Saw my life the way I wanted it
awards,applause,love,marriage kids- every bit
I saw reality more than that
some terrific cheer some ugly spats
I blinked at the smiling sun above
Wondered what next done with now
infactuation struck when eyes met
an affair I look back with fond regret
exams came easy and tough
many more challenges smooth and rough
I waited anxiously many occasion
in dusty corridors amidst confusion
walking through corridors means a lot
for it shows me what may happen or not
I always see so much ahead
And think to myself how time has sped
I am to walk many corridors new
To the occasion to emerge anything but few
As I walk I shall see, think and smile
That the corridor of my life just grew a new mile.


Corridors have always made me think about what happened and what is to happen. I always manage to think about my aspirations when I walk corridors. I ve been caught many times being someone else as I walked corridors in school. I ran through corridors in college because I wanted to get home soon. I Love the corridor in MSE where I spent many rainy afternoons. Where I eagerly anxiously waited to hear I got the GECIS job - My first stepping stone!!!Even the shady smoking zone corridor at SCOPE makes me think. But most of all I have very fond memories of the corridor in Vidya Mandir Adyar, where I waited every morning before class started. Another structure that I just love is the terrace, but thats another poem another time.!!!! If we had terraces of our lives, I guess it would be very tough to come down to earth....